Nov. 10th, 2008

ladymirth: (hamlet)

There is no thought in my head
Only a handful of brain cells
Tickling my skull
Like marbles trapped within a rattle
There are only vague feelings
Of contempt for my past
Surrealism of my present
And hollowness for the future
I am not there
Only an image that people see
Through the eyes of their memory
And expectations
Voices tell me who I am
Where I go and what I want
And yet, "I" do not exist
As though the astral umblical cord
Attaching self to my being
Has detached  and self-aborted
Leaving only a bleeding
And barren womb


My heart rams itself
Against my lungs
Tries to claw its way
Out through my throat
Trying to leave this body
Without substance
My soul trickles out
Day by night
Beneath my heavy eyelids
Escaping the vaccuum of mind
My breath counts lessen
My limbs atrophy
Death taking me
In all but physiology


I forget the beauty of the waking world
I forget the breath from lightened lungs
I forget the taste of want and thirst
I forget the feel of rain and sun

These things will no more encumber
My quest to cease my tremoring mind
Wandering a land between death and slumber
I crave only the peace of benumbed night

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