ladymirth: (AHBL - no!)
 I know, I know, I'm sorry, I have to get this out there. Feel free to use the scroll button. 

Re Eclipse Chapter 22: Fire and Ice

You. Are. Shitting. Me. 

Jesus, this book really is a trainwreck. And if Eclipse is this bad, chances are that Breaking Dawn is going to be a fucking natural disaster. 
ladymirth: (AHBL - no!)
Up to chapter fifteen of Eclipse.

This is the most toe-curlingly horrible drivel in book form I've ever read in my life. I can't believe that teenage girls and grown women swoon over these neanderthals. A controlling, borderline psychoitc, disgustingly chauvinistic vampire and a boorish caveman of a were-asshole (Whatever happened to my beautiful, sweet Jacob?!). Both of whom treat the woman they love like a fucking object rather than a person in her own right. Because in Smeyer's twisted little fantasy world, free will is something that only happens to boring people and twu wuv is the most important thing in the world, for which one should give up their humanity and a college education, but not their singleton status (WTFx100000).

Mary Sues I can put up with, but this level of deranged madness is severely testing me. Cleolinda groaned in her recap how inconvenient it is that e-books can't be thrown across the room and be set on fire. I echo tis sentiment.

Also, maybe it's because of my Buddhist upbringing, but I am not inclined to view people who'd rather hunt down and kill wild animals than humans as Not Evil. I believe that killing a dog is as great a sin as killing a man. And I understand that that's just my world-view, but I'm rather more interested in the safety of baby penguins in the Antartica than whether Bella gets to enjoy her sparkly twu wuv on a strict non-humanitarian diet. Especially since baby penguins are less detrimental to the efforts of women's rights movements of the last hundred years.

The only way this series could end happily for me now is if Edward and Jacob ripped each other to pieces over their little human doll and Bella dies by having a sea turtle dropped on her head while they're not looking.

Hey, at least I will be happy.

I suppose I'll finish the book anyway. It's kind of like watching a train wreck. You can't bear to watch it happen but its too horrifying to look away from either.

That, or I'm just masochistic.

*sigh* See you guys on the other side.
ladymirth: (bunny)
Meet one of Bollywood's hottest starlets, Sonam Kapoor.

Who is she: Sonam Kapoor was formerly better known as nineties hearthrob Anil Kapoor's daughter, or "that fat little kid" who was a personal assistant to one of the most influential contemporary Bollywood directors, Sanjay Leela Bhansali (of Devdas fame). One day, luck and Mr.SLB smiled on her and, after losing 35 kgs in six months, she was cast in the lead role of his much-hyped 2008 musical Saawariya

The movie bombed at the box office, but the lead-couple had already caught the nation's attention. Sonam Kapoor, in particular, captured young girls' imagination with her ugly-fat-duckling-turned-55kg-swan story and became a beacon of hope for angsty overweight kids everywhere. 

Right. So far so good.

Now meet her douchebag of a father, who decided to celebrate his daughter's 23rd birthday by buying her a sugarless cake.  

"I thought I had slimmed enough. I lost 35 kgs before Saawariya. I’ve been constantly keeping my weight down. But I think Dad knows the other girls are looking very slim these days. It was his way of letting me know that I needed to get even thinner. A strange present on my birthday."

But Dad Anil Kapoor did make a ’weighty’ statement. Sonam has caught on. "I’m going on a diet. I need to get thinner to look comparable with the other girls. Look at Deepika. She’s athletic and slim. I’m not an athlete. But I’m a runner. I love to go on long runs all on my own for miles and miles. That is a sure way to lose weight."

Okay, so she's not starving herself, (at least I hope not) and she's going to use running as a weight-loss method. So what's the matter?

Well, this:

With dad prodding her into a fat-free awakening Sonam is about to lose more kilos. "I have to. It’s not a vanity. It’s for my sanity. I can’t be happy being healthy when the other girls are frantically losing weight. So thanks to my Dad I’m losing more weight."

This woman is a stunning 5 ft 9", 135 pound twenty-frikkin'-three year old. She's healthy, talented and beautiful. But she's still not going to feel good about herself till she turns herself into a rake. Why? Because she will go insane if she doesn't end up as anorexic as other girls! 

Yes, Mr. Anil Kapoor, nothing says, "Happy Birthday to you, other girls aren't fat, why are you?" quite like a sugarless birthday cake. 

I dunno about you, but I think birthdays are about celebrating the good things you have in life. Like the fact that you are not a diebetic, for example. 

All this is rather ironic, given her fitness interview in Filmfare magazine. Note the last pearl of wisdom: Above all, always feel good about yourself no matter what size you are!

You clearly do practice what you preach, Miss Kapoor. Way to set a glowing example for all those teeny-boppers. Succumb to peer pressure and look like a barbecue stick, everyone!

In other news, you know the fairness cream companies have completely brainwashed India when they are allowed to do something like this: New Pond's White Beauty Advertisement Features Neha Dhupia Pwning Wheaty-Skinned Priyanka Chopra. 

Cut for the non-dial-up-friendly pics. )

Let it also be noted that this is a wonderful way for two leading names in Bollywood to exploit the fawning masses. Saif Ali Khan cheerfully plays a dickhead who ditches his twu wuv because her skin tone turns him off and Priyanka Chorpa plays the bimbo who will bleach her face white to get him back. Very commedable, you lot. Catch me buying a single movie of yours again. 

I'm serious. I'm so damn infuriated with this woman-hating industry that I feel like binning my entire collection of Bollywood DVDs. At least then I wouldn't have this collusion to stamp out any semblance of women's lib from the Eastern hemisphere on my conscience. 

Listen up, you pea-brained bimbos. You wanna know who the most beautiful woman in Bollywood is?

Suck. It. Up.
ladymirth: (AHBL - no!)
Swear to God, if I come across one more woman who tells me she's on a "watermellon diet"/ eats only an apple for breakfast/ is eating only one meal a day, I am going to totally lose my shit and throttle her.

What the fuck is WRONG with you people?!

I'm not being a hypocrite. I worry about overeating and obsess over my flabby stomach too. But my solution is to eat moderately and folow a steady workout regimen. I also use those hours I do not spend on friggin' Facebook to use the famous information superhighway to do a bit of homework on how and how far I can lose weight and tone down.

These women? The very mention of gym is anathema to them, they reject any technique that won't lose them 30 pounds a month and they come up with crazy-ass techniques they concoct in their own little heads - like eating only watermelons for lunch. Why? Because going to the gym is "too hard" or "too expensive".

*kicks something*


You can't be bothered to go to the gym, or you can't afford to go to the gym, but you can afford to starve yourself to death? And if a gym IS truly beyond your budget, then why not just do some basic stretching and aerobic exercises every day for twenty minutes?

I'll tell you why. Because the women of our day and generation are not trained to give a rat's fart about actual, long-term health. What they ARE brainwashed into believing is that their lives are worth much less than a person who can look good in a sheathe dress.

Call me a grandma, but I don't understand the modern concept of beauty anymore. The stick-thin creatures that are allowed to strut down the catwalk on TV makes my stomach turn. They are gaunt and hollow-eyed, and look vaguely like Aushwitz survivors. How people can compare THAT to a round cheeked, bright-eyed girl with some meat on her bones, I have NO idea.

But that's just me. Yes, stick-thin is attractive to some people. Plump is attractive to others. That's because beauty is a subjective issue. It's all in the eye of the beholder.

What's NOT subjective is good health. A healthy person is someone whose every organ fuctions at optimum capacity, be it their immune system, flexibility or brain power. How each person arrives at this point is subjective to their own unique bio-chemical make-up. Methods that work well for some do not produce the same results for others.

Here's an article that can explain the basics of how to gauge your state of health better.

Bottom-line, the main reason you exercise or diet should be to BE HEALTHIER. Losing weight is not always indicative of better health.

The point of living is to enjoy ALL the good things in life, not just a two-piece swimsuit. What the hell is the point of looking good in a swimsuit if you can't ever binge on pizza or stuff your face with chocolate occasionally? (Actually, gorging on junk food once a week while on a diet IMPROVES your metabolism and makes your diet more effective.) And it's not just food. What about the thrill of discovering just how strong and lithe a machine your body is? What about the sense of acheivement that comes from pushing yourself to swim just that one more lap when you feel about to collapse, and the thrill when you can FINALLY touch your forehead to your knees? What about knowing you are pyshically strong enough to land a significant punch on a guy who can't get that "no" means "no"?

You are missing out on half your life. Why? Because you want a 28-inch waistline in 20 days. Or because everybody else and their grandma's poodle thinks you should have a 28 inch waist. Which is even worse.

I will say it again.

My dear, dear, sisters, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

June 2009

 12 34 5 6
7 8 910 11 1213
141516 17181920
2122 2324 2526 27


RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags