ladymirth

I squealed like a pig in mud when I saw this:



RPattz ate chicken and cheese off his neck for the movie?! That's called CANON-SLASH right there!! OMFGHEDEXPLODEY!!!

*screams the rafters down*

I gakked it from the graphical condensed version of "Twilight for Dummies".

Also, I stopped feeling sore about having slogged through all twelve leaked chapters of Midnight Sun (upcoming novel by SMeyer which re-chronicles Twilight from Edward's POV) after I read Growing Up Cullen. Because it's all basically what'e said, yo. I flipped, flipped and scared most of the neighbourhood cats laughing.

Also in the category of Twilight-spoofery, you probably won't be able to appreciate how priceless this is unless you've read at least one book and know that she really does write like that! (Although I can't believe the writer actually went back and painstakingly counted and tallied all those situations. Yikes!)

Warning: None of the links are Edward-friendly.

I shall finish up with "Twatlighting - Boom-de-ya-da-style" courtesy of fandom_wank.

I love the books, but its the Twilight wank that I really fangirl. Day-um! It's like Christmas every day! *snuggles Twilight*

Keep on sparkling, honeys!

For my money, this is funnier than the entire wank. 

***

puipui: Dude, my cat could come up with a religion that makes more sense than Scientology. While hopped up on catnip. From beyond the grave.

(Several exchanges later about the technicalities of the cat dying and whether it is named Schrodinger and whether it should have its name changed for security reasons once it is a leader of a religious cult, somebody offers themselves up for enlightment via Cat.) 

pastri_archy: I for one, welcome this new feline religious overlord. What would be the tenets of this new doctrine?

puipui: I've asked the cat, and here they are:

Tenets

1. Feed the cat.
2. At our most fundamental level, we are both here and not, we both exist and do not. We are at one with the universe, at one with its power, and when we learn to harness that power, we can blah blah blah religion fishcakes. Mmm, fish.
3. I said feed the cat, bitch! Again! Do it now!
4. All couch arms shall be sacrifice to your new god. BOW! BOW, I SAY!
5. Same with your bed. Gimme. Yes, the whole thing. Because I said so.
6. There is no number 6.
7. Something something something worship me, whatever, I'm going to take a nap now, don't move anything around while I'm gone.

pastri_archy: *feeds the cats as the tenets dictate* Um, I'm a college student without a sofa. You can has one end of my bed?

puipui: She says the whole bed, sorry. All your beds are belong to cat. You can have the floor, but you'll have to get up if she decides to walk there later.

***

There are a few reasons why I can't seem to stop poking in on fandom_wank, and this is one of them. 

If there is anybody on my flist who loves me vewy much, they shall make me icons of this. *puts on best kitty face*

ETA: Okay, so there are other things funnier than the Cat God, and this is one of them. I hereby claim the right to have all of narcissam's babies.