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ladymirthI've finished Twilight, and I'm halfway through New Moon.
I love it!
I don't get it. It's an average book, with silly vampire lore, an annoying heroine and a rather hot werewolf. I don't even like first-person narratives, aside from Rebecca.
ButIcantputitdownZOMGpleasesendhelp!
*meep*
ETA:They fursploded! THEY FURSPLODED! Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ on a popsicle stand, they actually do fursplode! ROTFLMFAO! Have I mentioned that I love this book?!
I love it!
Okay, so the writing is mediocre, the analogies sometimes bizzare and I want to whack this woman's editor with a hot poker because the sheer lack of editing is atrocious. But the earnest Gary-Stu-ness of Edward Cullen and the sparkly vampire mush is sheer addiction. More than once I've nearly ruptured an internal gland laughing at Edward's sparkly perfection (he even has mad parallel parking skillz, OMG!) and Bella's tendecy to have vapours and be borne to the fainting couch every other chapter. It's just sheer, mindless, fun.
But New Moon has actually taken it a step further and made me actually make an emotional investment in a character - Jacob Black. He is such a darling baby, for all he's such a hulking giant. Even if I hadn't already thoroughly spoiled myself about the overall plot before reading the book, it's obvious to me that he doesn't stand a chance in hell with Bella. Who btw, is positively driving me up the creek in this book. I've been suppressing the desire to yell, "WEREWOLF, you bloody idiot! WEREWOLF! Don't make me bring Snape in here!" and it's taken her thirteen fucking chapters to finally get on the damn cluetrain. And just when I was breathing a sigh of relief, it turns out that she thinks the wolves are murderers, in contrast to her angelic bloodsucker ex-boyfriend (WHO IS USING TELEPATHY TO COMMUNICATE, YOU MORON, THEY'RE NOT DELUSIONS!) and contrary to the myth that Jacob told her about at the start of the first book.
WTF? I want to peer in Bella's ear just to see whether I can see sunlight out the other end. Bone-headed Mary Sue, get thou gone to Sparklypoo!
At this point, I'm still reading solely because of Jacob. Why on earth Bella would prefer a hundred-year-old sanctimonious berk who feels like a stone, (Stone! How is that attractive?!) has the pallor of a hemopheliac and who she can't sleep with without contracting hypothermia, over this big, adorably shaggy, vulnerable,warm-blooded specimen of true teenagehood. What, is she secretly a lizard or something?
I don't have anything against Edward (overlooking his creepy stalker, controlling tendencies because he is an angsty sparkly Gary Stu vampire and that makes it all okay) because hey, I'd like to be taken care of and cocooned by a mature, god-like man, providing he'd still respect me in the morning. This is where the line between reality and fantasy is drawn. If a woman ever gave into a man like that in real life, she'd completely lose her sense of independece and become something between an irritation and a toy to him. But within the confines of an escapist YA novel, you can shelve your inner feminist and just enjoy the ride.
But Edward's perfection is annoying. The inequality that only seems to chafe at Bella galls me. And unlike Bella, my whole life does not revolve around a man, and I don't think real love would entail changing a fundamental part of myself to sustain the relationship on fairer grounds.
Not that I don't think vampires are pretty damn awesome. In fact, I'd sign up myself, if it weren't for the whole immortality deal. All good stories are good because they know when to end, and I'd like my life to be a good story. Immortality disturbs me. I'd get dreadfully bored after the first hundred years.
I can't help but think that vampires are somewhat wasted on Meyer, because she doesn't have a clue how to write a decent action sequence. If anybody wanted to read YA books just for the kickass vampire love, I'd recommend Christopher Pike's The Last Vampire series. Alisa Perne could kick the entire Cullen clan's asses any day.
Let's take Jacob, on the other hand. He is beautifully young and human and flawed and he and Bella are chums first and foremost, sharing the kind of real human rapport that Bella and Edward never had. And he is such a freakishly tall gigantor (6 ft 5!) with shaggy hair and large, beautiful hands and awkward feet and tanned skin and a puppy eyes and a boyish smile and a destiny he did not choose and holy cow he's Sam fucking Winchester, isn't he? O_O
No wonder I love him. What flour-bathed RPattz can compare to the beauty of Jared Padalecki?
Right. Enough confusing fandoms. I'm off for more Jacob love.
But New Moon has actually taken it a step further and made me actually make an emotional investment in a character - Jacob Black. He is such a darling baby, for all he's such a hulking giant. Even if I hadn't already thoroughly spoiled myself about the overall plot before reading the book, it's obvious to me that he doesn't stand a chance in hell with Bella. Who btw, is positively driving me up the creek in this book. I've been suppressing the desire to yell, "WEREWOLF, you bloody idiot! WEREWOLF! Don't make me bring Snape in here!" and it's taken her thirteen fucking chapters to finally get on the damn cluetrain. And just when I was breathing a sigh of relief, it turns out that she thinks the wolves are murderers, in contrast to her angelic bloodsucker ex-boyfriend (WHO IS USING TELEPATHY TO COMMUNICATE, YOU MORON, THEY'RE NOT DELUSIONS!) and contrary to the myth that Jacob told her about at the start of the first book.
WTF? I want to peer in Bella's ear just to see whether I can see sunlight out the other end. Bone-headed Mary Sue, get thou gone to Sparklypoo!
At this point, I'm still reading solely because of Jacob. Why on earth Bella would prefer a hundred-year-old sanctimonious berk who feels like a stone, (Stone! How is that attractive?!) has the pallor of a hemopheliac and who she can't sleep with without contracting hypothermia, over this big, adorably shaggy, vulnerable,warm-blooded specimen of true teenagehood. What, is she secretly a lizard or something?
I don't have anything against Edward (overlooking his creepy stalker, controlling tendencies because he is an angsty sparkly Gary Stu vampire and that makes it all okay) because hey, I'd like to be taken care of and cocooned by a mature, god-like man, providing he'd still respect me in the morning. This is where the line between reality and fantasy is drawn. If a woman ever gave into a man like that in real life, she'd completely lose her sense of independece and become something between an irritation and a toy to him. But within the confines of an escapist YA novel, you can shelve your inner feminist and just enjoy the ride.
But Edward's perfection is annoying. The inequality that only seems to chafe at Bella galls me. And unlike Bella, my whole life does not revolve around a man, and I don't think real love would entail changing a fundamental part of myself to sustain the relationship on fairer grounds.
Not that I don't think vampires are pretty damn awesome. In fact, I'd sign up myself, if it weren't for the whole immortality deal. All good stories are good because they know when to end, and I'd like my life to be a good story. Immortality disturbs me. I'd get dreadfully bored after the first hundred years.
I can't help but think that vampires are somewhat wasted on Meyer, because she doesn't have a clue how to write a decent action sequence. If anybody wanted to read YA books just for the kickass vampire love, I'd recommend Christopher Pike's The Last Vampire series. Alisa Perne could kick the entire Cullen clan's asses any day.
Let's take Jacob, on the other hand. He is beautifully young and human and flawed and he and Bella are chums first and foremost, sharing the kind of real human rapport that Bella and Edward never had. And he is such a freakishly tall gigantor (6 ft 5!) with shaggy hair and large, beautiful hands and awkward feet and tanned skin and a puppy eyes and a boyish smile and a destiny he did not choose and holy cow he's Sam fucking Winchester, isn't he? O_O
No wonder I love him. What flour-bathed RPattz can compare to the beauty of Jared Padalecki?
Right. Enough confusing fandoms. I'm off for more Jacob love.
I don't get it. It's an average book, with silly vampire lore, an annoying heroine and a rather hot werewolf. I don't even like first-person narratives, aside from Rebecca.
ButIcantputitdownZOMGpleasesendhelp!
*meep*
ETA:They fursploded! THEY FURSPLODED! Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ on a popsicle stand, they actually do fursplode! ROTFLMFAO! Have I mentioned that I love this book?!
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(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-26 02:48 pm (UTC)I am possibly at the same reading stage as you. And yea, Bella is just well she needs a slap or something :P
i think the main reason the book is going on is because of Edward.
I like want myself an Edward. *points to my last entry*
But i wont say more cuz i dunno if how much u know about Jacob..so i shall keep my next point for next time, hopefully i wont forget it by then :P :P
but Sam definitely pwns Rpattz.. sorry S.Ransom :(
(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-28 08:19 am (UTC)Well, I kinda did miss the Sparkler somewhat until he showed up. More because I wanted Bella to shut up whining than anything else. He's really not my type.
But i wont say more cuz i dunno if how much u know about Jacob..so i shall keep my next point for next time, hopefully i wont forget it by then.
Yes, I was aware that Jacob would get a personalitytransplant in Eclipse. I thought I was prepared for it, but it was no less distressing when it happened. =( Still love him best, though. He has the excuse of being sixteen. Edward is a 107.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-29 07:03 am (UTC)lol i dunno i would still take Edward. cold over hot anyday.
ahahaa