Wish for a starring role and you find your life has turned into a sitcom with you as the main lead.

[ladymirth]

Sis was rooting through old stationery just now and came across a note I'd written her earlier this year. She says she can remember it very clearly.

Me: *gesticulates wildly*
Sis: What?
Me: Mmgdlf!
Sis: Just spit it out. 
Me: *snarls*
Sis: God, you're such a bitch! *flounces off*
Me: *follows after her and writes her a note.*

Note:  I can't talk because my tongue is swollen and everytime I do anything to it the wound starts throbbing like mad. I was up half the night sucking ice-cubes to keep the swelling and the pain down. If you want proof, count the ice cubes remaining in the freezer. Only problem is, it can't be advisable for a person with tonsilitis to swallow ice in the middle of the night. 
I can't go to class today because I'll be laughed at if I try to use sign language in Speech Communication or shove a note pad at my instructor. I can't even call and tell them I can't come because I can''t talk. And I'm on strict orders not to miss any more classes. =(

Sis: *looks at my pitiful expression and falls about laughing* 
Me: *woobie face*

It's like I'm some sort of perpetual cosmic sitcom. Seriously, why do all these bizzare things keep happening to me?