We Have Come, Pilgrims, To The End Of Our Journey.

Finished Breaking Dawn.

It wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be. Eclipse prepared me for what was to come, and I'd read and boggled over all the spoilers beforehand anyway, so I was not caught unawares as the rest of the poor sods who read Breaking Dawn cluelessly for the first time. Having cleolinda  's hilarious Twilight summaries on hand also contributed toward making it an almost rewarding experience. They were hilarious enough when I read them before, but reading it in tandem with the books was priceless and made the bad stuff all go away. Once you get into the right frame of mind, the whole thing is not more painful than really bad fanfic anyway. 

( Breaking Dawn - the best and the worst )

 
That's about all my scrambled brain can come up with. All in all, the book was all the LOLfan in me wanted. Maybe I should be grateful for Eclipse for preparing me somewhat. Actually, I kinda feel the strange urge to read it again. 

...

Oh. My. God. This book has given me Stockholm Syndrome. 

HELP!
 

Return to joblessness.

I've gakked come across some choice quotes from Cleolinda, and shall paste them here for further gakking and posterity.

"This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force." - Dorothy Parker. (This aptly describes Eclipse)

"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think." - Dorothy Parker. (I'd marry this woman if she wasn't dead.)

"The free-lance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps." - Robert Benchley.

"Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment." - Robert Benchley (Preach it!)

"Work consists of whatever a body is OBLIGED to do, and... Play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do." - Mark Twain.

MOAR SPARKLY EPIC LULZ!

I squealed like a pig in mud when I saw this:



RPattz ate chicken and cheese off his neck for the movie?! That's called CANON-SLASH right there!! OMFGHEDEXPLODEY!!!

*screams the rafters down*

I gakked it from the graphical condensed version of "Twilight for Dummies".

Also, I stopped feeling sore about having slogged through all twelve leaked chapters of Midnight Sun (upcoming novel by SMeyer which re-chronicles Twilight from Edward's POV) after I read Growing Up Cullen. Because it's all basically what'e said, yo. I flipped, flipped and scared most of the neighbourhood cats laughing.

Also in the category of Twilight-spoofery, you probably won't be able to appreciate how priceless this is unless you've read at least one book and know that she really does write like that! (Although I can't believe the writer actually went back and painstakingly counted and tallied all those situations. Yikes!)

Warning: None of the links are Edward-friendly.

I shall finish up with "Twatlighting - Boom-de-ya-da-style" courtesy of fandom_wank.

I love the books, but its the Twilight wank that I really fangirl. Day-um! It's like Christmas every day! *snuggles Twilight*

Keep on sparkling, honeys!